Gaffers Gob 8th April – Stratten FC – Won 13-7

Matt, Alan (1), Gareth (2), Jason (5), James (5 MOM)

Well what a difference a week makes. The horrors of last weeks performance have been put to the back of the mind with what has been roundly as the best game the Mollies have ever played in. Those with long memories and service would pitch it around the level of our 10-1 win over Park FC in about 2006. Yes we were that good. The match saw the thumb printed Robbie making himself unavailable leaving us with 4 players and begging Jason to fill the void. With only 5 players the Gaffer was wondering if the law of the sod would mean that he would have to end up on pitch as one of our outfield players had to go in goal through injury. But, alas his dreams of scoring a Thursday night hat-trick have again been neatly sidestepped by fate.

So to the match, and an action packed, event filled goal fest it was with seemingly both teams avoiding defensive duties to have as many shots in as short a time as possible. Still, at least the Gaffer was able to help Stratten by letting their very first shot go through both his gloves and then legs. An inauspicious start indeed. But this was not the lowest point of the Gaffers woes with the second half finding him completely misfielding a throw out to toss it gently to a waiting Stratten forward who would fire it into the back of the net.

However, the depths of the Gaffers errors only served to heighten to seeming calm and fluidity of the (unusually) young Mollies outfield who were frequently slowing the game down and passing it to each other in all areas of the pitch. The introduction of Jason seemed to take the playmaking pressure from Gareth and gave him an extra lease of life and freedom to create chances up front and defend in depth. Alan was his muscular self running up and down the pitch and shooting as best he can. Although he scored one goal, it would appear that he was actually aiming for a raking pass to the corner and miss hit it to go in. James was chuffed to bits to be given his MOM award, benefiting from the space given to him by the running of Jason and Gareth so that he scored as many goals as I can remember in a match. And the Gaffer made up for his earlier errors to save a penalty with his toe after being sent the wrong way by the striker.

All round, I may as well retire as I can’t see us playing so well again. And the Mollies have seemingly nailed themselves into third place in the league.

Gaffers Gob -1st April 2010

Celtenham FC lost 16-2

Matt (MOM), Alan, James (1), Mark, Gareth (1), Robbie

This will be a very short post today. This has to go down as the worst Mollies performance in the Gaffers living memory. No communication or tackling leading to a lack of shooting chances. It is a shame to have 3 wins in a row tarnished by such a poor all round display. The poorness of the defensive performance can be measured by the gaffer in goal being awarded man of the match honours despite letting in 16. Truly shocking stuff. nuff said!

26th November – Cunning Stunts – defeat 10-2

The return of the Gob

After a long lay of many months, and the associated holiday of Lungboy who confessed that he has been “sorting my shit out”, I decided that I should dust of my typewriter and actually ensure that an article was on the decidedly inactive Mollies blog.

Despite the lay off, the same old problems still affect the Mollies. All told last night was a decent defensive performance against (cue sense of déjà vu) a younger, fitter, quicker and more skilful team. And this is at the root of the continued bottom feeding of the Mollies. We are currently sat at the bottom (*alongside and unassigned team) of our division on zero points with only the upcoming two games against unassigned teams to gift us six points. It’s like Wednesday all over again.

To be fair we have played the top two teams in the last two weeks conceding 21 goals and scoring 9. The majority of the team felt that this was a good showing against two teams that on paper should have completely mugged us. The Gob would agree with this but the red marks dotting my body from being a human dart board show my wish that our marking and tackling would improve just a bit. We have had a tendency in the last couple of weeks to allow attackers to get behind us and move into the corners all unawares. This has led to a number of crosses attacking the top of the D which in previous were infrequent occurrences.

Not so much the week before, but definitely last night, we couldn’t hit a barn door in anger. We have improved our ability to hit the ball with the introduction of Rob and Nathan. Also with the return of Lungboy there was a sense of optimism that we actually our strongest side available with an ability to jeopardise the opposition goal. Strangely, with the glut of shooting ability available, we could only aim at the back board rather than the net. It was not as if the opposition keeper was brilliant (as he threw one of our two goals into his own net). Had we been only slightly more accurate the score line would likely have been much more flattering. It is positive that James has been scoring much more regularly of late but with greasy pitches for the last two weeks, long shots should have allowed a following attacker to hit a rebound or saved shot.

Also the issue of substitutions reared it ugly head once again. An apoplectic Steve chiding the rest of the team for only allowing him 4 minutes of pitch time in the first half. However, a slightly different and amused take would be that “Chopper” was defending with muscular approach employed by your average prop forward and would likely result in a sin binning. As it stands his second half performance had him crawling of the pitch on his hands and knees before coming off, but the Gob was able to see him grabbing shirts and irritating the opposition attackers with great regularity. No doubt this led to the opposition throwing the ball away on our free kick in the last minute when they were 10-2 up. Sportsmanlike indeed.

All told, we benefited from the return of Leo after a 4 week lay off. However, with only one game in December, who knows what the stamina of our band of oldish men will be like come the new year. When we no doubt play another, younger, fitter, quicker and more skilful team once again.

The Tournament - Pictorial Review 28/8/09 pt4 - The Megabus Collection

Gaffer's Gob 23rd July 2009 - Solent Pirates

Today we woke up to a multiplicity of papers adorning themselves with headlines such as "Mollie's Mugged" and "Maguires Victim of Smash and Grab Raid".

The big question is what led to these headlines when at half 8 last night, we took to the pitch with confidence and youthful enthusiasm granted by the youngest ever Molly line-up. This confidence transformed itself to a rare display of pace on the pitch and confident slick passing which pulled and tore the opposition defence into bad positions leaving gaps for our young up-front trio to hit shots at goal.

The ease with which we took control of the match was written large in the behaviour on an increasingly fractious opposition who pushed and clipped the heels of our players as the first half wore on. However, the trickery continued with the ball being passed between Gareth, Jason and Steve before it being fed to an unmarked James on the left who drilled the ball into the bottom right hand corner. At times, the game felt very easy with the Pirates being restricted to shots from their own half which surprisingly (given my skills are more geared towards close in blocks) left the Gaffer largely untroubled.

So then, what could conceivably lead to the aforementioned news splash?

About one minute before half time with the Mollie's sitting in a comfortable 6-2 lead, the ball came down to our right back corner and was being held up by their midfielder with Gareth attacking the ball. As can happen in these areas, it all got a bit handbaggy when their player swung an arm back and (for the sake of balanced reporting) accidentally hit Gareth in the mouth with a swinging elbow. Cue our cheerleaders shouts of anguish and Gareth and their player starting to push and swing at each other. Easily dealt with you might feel by a sin binning of the two miscreants. However, like a torpedo shot from an opposition defensive quadrant their defender runs the length of the pitch to club Wor Gareth a couple of times about the back of the head . Not Cool. This led to all players being sent off and the match being abandoned as the opposition could not play with only 3 players. A real shame in ending what had been a gilt edged Mollie's performance.

Still, no harm, we confirmed with the referee that in these situations, as we could carry on playing and were winning comfortably, the match would be awarded to us by dint of a 10-0. So then, you can imagine my annoyance after checking the website last night that the game had been awarded the other way. On ringing Goals, i was informed by the manager that it was being handled that Gareth was at fault (despite the 20 yard flying punch) and that in all likelihood, at best we could expect a score draw.

To carry on the piratical and nautical theme, i feel like someone's nicked me boat!

Gaffers Gob: 26th March 2009 - Sniffers‏ FC

On entering the bar area you could cut the atmosphere with a knife. What had happened in the last week to turn the normally placid Mollie's into characters from Shameless? Well if you look down the blog you can see an entry from our "Anonymous" commentator which is full of diatribe and half truths. This entry caused such offence that the team has become somewhat fractured. Anon's or DJ's comments he asserted were based on his belief that Alan and Steve don't play to win. What he seems to fail to realise is that we all play to win but that we put enjoying our football above trying to achieve promotion. Consequently, although we frequently get our backside handed to us by superior teams, we don't mind as we just enjoy playing the game for the fun of running around. In any event, last nights performance, showed the lack of foundation in our anonymous geordie cheerleaders beliefs.

There was a lot riding on this match as if we won and Red Bull Utd lost, we would be promoted. Clearly, Wor Don thought we would throw this one and avoid the Premiership. It was a burning sense of injustice that the Mollie's took the astro turf on a cold and windy March evening. Unfortunately, as soon as the match kicked off, we were immediately out matched in terms of possession and movement. However, the Gaffer, in an uncharacteristic show of dexterity and movement, pulled out a number of saves at the edge of his diving range. It was unfortunate that his earlier saves went for nothing when he let a shot that was clearly going passed the post nestle into the corner of the net. Big Oops.

The Mollie's were being worked hard in defence and Steve and Leo were in danger of being over run. It seemed that as hard as we tackled, and as fast as we moved, they used their possession better and were more inventive in their movement and so created chances by the dozen. In contrast, when the Mollie's had the ball, we were knocked off it and gave it away before threatening their Goal. Gareth was again misfiring claiming a bad neck. What ever the truth, in the 4 years I've played for Mollie's, i have seen his level of speed and dexterity diminish as he has left school, got a job and started noticing beer and fags. Much like any old person, his mind is willing but his body can no longer do what the mind asks of it. That is my explanation for his consistent wishing to run the ball out of defence and being robbed of it by 2 to 3 players when he could easily have passed it. James problems kind of went the other way. Following his brilliance of 3 weeks ago, he continues to try repeating his incisive passing but tended to hit any other colour than dark blue. The one bright spot was his lone first half goal which at least stopped the possibility of a shut out which was very much on the cards in the early stages of the game. We went into half time about 6-1 down and looking down the wrong end of a really bad wedgie.

The second half was much improved. tactically we decided to hit shots at the opposition earlier and play slightly higher up the pitch. There was little point in holding back as we needed to win to stand any chance of promotion. James started to pass a little more accurately to link with Alan for probably the goal of the game which was through one touch passing and a first time shot. The match was very open in the second half as the Mollie's began to exert themselves. The gaffer has infrequently been given as much work to do as the game descended into you attack, we attack patterns of play. We started to hit the target and by my calculations, the second half finished 6-6. A far better return for our efforts and highlighting an improvement in our shooting accuracy. We still passed as if we were colour blind but because they constantly had 3 people in attack, we were able to catch them on the break. This was the biggest improvement on the first half when the only person not in our third of the pitch was their keeper.

And so ends possibly the most controversial Mollie's season for some time. It was a season beset by problems and one where a change of venue has been mooted. Also, we descended into a bit of infighting but hopefully no one can argue that we aren't all committed to trying to win if only for the fun of it. This season the Mollie's also found out how much we rely on Leo as he tends to stabilise the whole right flank and have an attacking as well as defensive impact.

Alan has lost, found, lost, found and again lost his shooting boots but makes up for it by covering as much of the pitch as possible in 40 minutes. James has followed the family trait of inconsistency by swinging from genius to madness week to week. i think his delicate equilibrium has been badly affected by Steve stealing the penalty taking responsibilities from under his nose. Steve has continued to be a defensive stalwart but is finding a taste for scoring goals he has previously not been far up the pitch to attempt. It is encouraging to overhear opposition cries every week as he barrels people to the floor. No doubt he continues to be our dirtiest player. On the odd occasion Robbie has played, he has been a solid performer in defence and gives Leo the cover to abandon being a wing back. In my opinion there continue to be encouraging signs and next season should be good, as long as we can play every week! There is little doubt that the names on the league from week 1 bear no resemblance to the names at week 10.

Team for next weeks kick off so far is Matt, Steve, Alan, James. Times will be confirmed over the weekend.

Gaffers Gob: 19th March 09‏

Against all odds, the Mollie's agreed to play back to back footy matches, and against even longer odds, we completed them, although no doubt we are all suffering the following day.

Much like watching England play Football, Rugby, Cricket or any number of other sports, the league game against SEC was an abject disappointment. Our relative league positions and 5 a side experience promised a win and 3 points for the Mollie's, but as ever, the Mollie's flattered to deceive. In recent matches the Mollie's scored goals with abandon but leaked them with an equal lack of care. It was therefore with some optimism that the reintroduction of Robbie would tighten the defence whilst the return of Gareth would maintain our run of free scoring football. However, these best laid plans were not to be. Despite facing an injured stand in goal keeper, Al, James and Gareth could not hit a barn door with any great regularity. Therefore, although we let in 10, which was 6 less then the previous matches, we only scored 5. The big difference from last week was Leo's self imposed absence. Clearly, the Mollie's have missed his athleticism in defence and threat up-front. No doubt, he has revelled in the added attacking responsibility since Big Mike went on his sabbatical.

He had an immediate opportunity to show his worth when he played in the following match against 24/7 from division 1. The team appear to have as many players as a Rugby squad showing incredible strength in depth coupled with minimal on pitch time. They also had a player who hit the ball with utter ferocity leaving Robbie with stinging legs from blocking his shots. They also had a very good goalkeeper who saved shots and held the ball well. However, i do not believe that 24/7 are any better then us, but we suffered in the second half of the second match through the expected lack of stamina. However, that is not to take away from the teams much better performance than in the first match. Leo had the freedom to attack the right flank whilst Alan was a constant threat on the left. It was positive that James scored in the second match but this did prove to be a difficult night for him. Equally the gaffer did have a disappointing second half in terms of distribution. However, thankfully, all the return shots were saved. No one appears to know what happened to Gareth when he subbed himself. However, he had left Goals by the time the team entered the bar area.

It is prudent to dread the video that was taken of the first match and will likely soon end up on You Tube. The Old Sea Dog is hoping that it will be like Steve's New Boots but in my opinion, it will be a bit of a horror show. I take few positives from the opening match of the night other than it should have removed the possibility of promotion. However, on reviewing the league, it is still a mathematical possibility if we win next week and Red Bull United lose.

Kick off is half 8 next week.

Gaffers Gob: 16 March 09

Apologies for the delay in the publishing of the latest Gob. Reasons have been a mixture of crazily excessive workload as well as shame over the gaffers recent performances in goal. This admission in no way justifies the scandalous criticism that has been published on the blog.

To be fair, the gaffer still firmly believes that the ref miscounted last week and we actually beat Ali Jazeera. In any event, the team did perform well with a makeshift attack. In an absolute rarity, all outfield players scored. Alongside this, James is looking more assured up-front although he did tend to suffer and drop back when tired. What has been positive over the last two games is the way the Molly's moved the ball around and scored from all areas instead of relying on a focal point up-front. However, concerns and irritations continue about the lack of penetration or threat whenever we get a freekick.

i feel i should report on the Gaffer's and Lungboy's man-date to Pitch Invasion in Eastleigh. Overall saving on fees would be £7 per week. There were some significant differences in the rules which will take some getting used to and the pitch appears wider and longer allowing more room which would be good for Gareth. The starkest difference is the lack of head height rule which means that Mike can get away with his adventurous shooting. Keepers kick out and there are throw ins and corners. Also the D is in play to outfield players. That's good for me as i feel more comfortable dealing with attackers up close rather than long shots. The goals are narrower but slightly taller. Overall, i would say that the game looks as fast as Goals but with the extra area on the pitch, players will likely run further. I also noticed that keepers tend to run more to collect the ball and kick out. Alongside this, i was disappointed with the lack of a bar or changing area. Certainly, a season in Pitch Invasion will be a new challenge, but overall, I'm not convinced that it will be a positive change. The other option is a different 5 a side area in Millbrook, but this is on a Monday and i definitely don't want to change to a Monday night as i like playing mid week.

I guess that this issue will likely raise it 's head again in the future. Tomorrow sees the unexpected return of Robbie to the defence at a pre 8pm kick off. The opposition is unknown to us but they have not had the best start to playing at Goals, so hopefully we can pick up more points as Leo will be given more freedom to play further up the pitch.

Gaffers Gob - Sniffers - 18th February 2009

Many hailed the return of Steve and his reassuming control of the man purse / kitty. Just as important was his return to the heart of the Molly's defence. Steve again played with guts and determination and no small amount of skill. For those who saw it, his tricking an opposition attacker with a step over was a sight to behold. This though was more than outweighed by his trying to run the ball out of defence, being robbed of it and the ball being drilled into the back of the net.

Leo again put in an energy packed performance that covered all parts of the pitch. At one point he was even seen putting the more sensitive parts of his body on the line in blocking goal bound efforts by the opposition. Alan and James made timely returns from injury to enter into the fray. Alan was again busy in all areas of the pitch although his finishing could have been a touch straighter. I do remember on more than one occasion Al missing open goals from the edge of the D although to be fair he did get one in. James was again busy in attack scoring a couple. The main threat in attack was little Mike; included because the Gaffer felt that of the return of three players in to a game with no subs was asking for trouble. He did get 4 goals although he tends to play with the intended trickery of Gareth with less of the success. The Gaffer believes (until undoubtedly informed otherwise) that he had a pretty solid game in goal last night pulling off some good saves and letting in less rubbish than normal.

All in all, the early part of the game was effort filled but confused. The gaffer thought we were supposed to be playing a diamond but the game looked like a junior school playground affair with headless chicken like bunching and chasing the ball. Things did settle down when we began to play in 2-2 formation. Also things improved markedly when we realised that the opposition had the most inept goalkeeper to ever grace the hallowed turf at Goals. It seemed that if our shooting was on target, the likelihood was that we would score. It was more opposition inadvertent luck that on occasion the ball was deflected off of his toe passed the post. Either way, i was pleased with our effort last night and we should have averted the threat of promotion to the premiership by losing this 16-8.

Next week is an 8.30 kick off and will hopefully see the return of Robbie to the ranks. No doubt Leo will see this as a green light to try to make up for not scoring last night.

Gaffers Gob 4th February 09 - Ali Jazeera

On another cold winters night where it literally snowed for half the match, The Mollie's (in light of last season) unbelievably achieved a 66% win ratio with a 15 - 10 win over Ali Jazeera.

What made this even more impressive was the makeshift quality of our side after the enforced absences of Alan, James, Big Mike, Steve along with the arguably more important absence of ever present cheerleader, Don. Regular subs Adam and Little Mike were also unavailable for various reason. All this heralded the return of Robbie and the introduction of his mate Dan. In true Mollie's fashion Dan was given the task of ploughing up the snow covered left whilst Leo used his seniority to choose the somewhat more clear right with Gareth roaming in the centre. Robbie, labouring under the confidence of Leo had the sweeping role at the bottom of the diamond.

After the rough tactics of last weeks opponents, it was nice to enjoy playing a team with a similar level of skill and cleanliness when challenging for the ball. Gareth enjoyed acres of space up front seemingly able to lose his markers with impunity. This allowed the Gaffer to utilise his long throw skills and avoid the midfield altogether. Both Gareth and Leo scored Goals from this tactic. Dan also scored twice on his debut. After taking a while to gain the confidence to shoot, he scored his brace in the second half with a couple of cleanly finished side footed efforts.

Defensively, Robbie played as if he had not had any time off from his duties. He was up with the pace all game and played with a certain tirelessness in defence frequently getting in last minutes legs and feet to block shots. Gareth and Leo took on attacking duties and Gareth put in a performance reminiscent of when he was a sports college student. He looked fitter than he has in a long time and struck the ball well returning with 9 goals. Leo appeared to enjoy his role in attack and was a constant menace to the opposition defence. Although less accurate than Gareth, Leo also did well scoring 4. The gaffer was pretty pleased with his game and put in a fair number of good saves. Once again this was tempered by my conceding a few soft ones through legs and hands etcetera. More importantly.

All in all, it was a good all round performance in far from pleasant conditions. For the first time in the gaffers memory at least, we played when it was snowing but at least the weather meant that we had to keep running to avoid catching pneumonia.

Next week is a 7pm kick off against Gareth's old colleagues from sports soccer. His scouting report is that they are young but a bit rubbish! Touch wood he is right and our win ratio can hit 75%. All statistics supplied by Jeff Stelling.

Gaffers Gob - Local Lads 28/1/09‏

After no Gob report due to illness the Gaffer returns with the news of a 16 - 5 loss to newly promoted team the Local Lads. It was a difficult team performance which saw the return of James and the arrival of another of recruiting sergeant Al's extended family, Rob. despite the newness of these players, it wasn't a bad performance from the Mollie's but we were over matched by a younger, fitter, rougher team with more shooting power up front.

The first five minutes left the Gaffer feeling a lot like i was playing dodgeball rather than football such was the collinder likeness of our defence and the oppositions love of shooting. Fortunately in those early foray's, the opposition were either hitting too straight or too wide leading to a nervy 0-0 after the first five. However this wasn't to last but the Mollie's were able to strike back with some clinical finishing from Gareth. The only other chink of light for us was the opposition goalie having some kind of mental breakdown everytime we hit the back of the net. Clearly, the opposition need to sustain a tight defence or their keeper may not last the season without a stint in the DOP.

For the rest of the team, Al was energetic as ever and all over the pitch, and Leo was left covering the back. James played up front with Gareth and Rob was more of the attacking mindset. This all meant that as we chased the game in the second half, we were left exposed at the back. This (as well as our obviously worse levels of fitness) may have been the reason a 7-4 half time turned into a 16-5 final score. Next week we are again playing Ali Jazeera and we very much need the return of Big Mike. We may have benefitted from the surprise last minute inclusion of Adam and his disciplined defence. Unfortunately, his new shocking working hours meant he could not make even this late a kick off. Either way, the early signs indicate that this season is going to shape up in similar fashion to the last two with us benefitting from default wins and praying for the return of core players to bolster our oft fragile team.

On another note, having read the Goals write up for last nights match i am even more convinced that Local Lads will be promoted as they are clearly receiving impartial treatment from Goals. This in light of receiving the rub of the green last night in some key decisions and them being the focus of the Goals journo's fantasies.

Gaffers Gob - 7th January 2009 The Hurricanes

After a three week break, we have the welcome and much heralded return of the Gaffer's Gob. This return (as well as the impended relegation to division 1) clearly inspired the team to greater heights of effort and a first on pitch win this season.

The general euphoria surrounding a last gasp, snatch of victory from the jaws of defeat should not hide a performance that was tarnished by a fair amount of ring rust. In the first half it was evident that the team were scared of shooting from anywhere but the edge of the D. It was quite depressing to witness the ball moving from side to side across the pitch with opportunities to go for goal being spurned for the option of a pass that inevitably didn't go to feet. That's not to say the gaffer was immune from the odd slip. His first throw out ended up in the pitch side netting showing an incompetence and height that only Mikes oft maligned shooting could hope to emulate. Alongside the passing, i also felt that last night the defence had a tendency to sit on the D which allowed the opposition time on the ball and to approach the Goal. As we get used to the game again i hope these creases in the performance can get ironed out.

More positively, when Alan gained the cohones to have a shot he struck the ball well and scored the winning goal. Mike was again reasonably assured on the ball and was effort filled in his charging up and down the pitch. Leo and Steve again put in top drawer defensive performances although the match highlight will surely be Leo's drive towards goal from the right wing which was horribly sliced and skied. Gareth put in another trick filled performance and was in evidence wherever the ball was. The Gaffer feels that he was reasonably assured in Goal and did not have to many howlers other than the aforementioned throw out. He is also pleased to have put in a seasonal Kodak moment when clutching the ball out of the air mid dive. However, Leo rather spoiled this by saying i could have shuffled across and got behind it. Obviously i disagree as do the judges who awarded me 9.7!

All in all, it was a good return to winning ways and Steve put in a magic first performance as treasurer. Just to clarify, his appointment as treasurer does not mean that he has been promoted from Vice Gaffer to Gaffer.

Gaffers Gob - The Elite 3rd Dec 08

To twist another saying to my ends, lasts night match can be summed up by "what a difference a Gareth makes".

Kudos to any player who stepped onto the pitch last night in what were almost arctic conditions.

Building on the improvement of last week, Gareth returned to the team to add an extra dimension of aggressive running and trickery with the ball. If he can just remember how to shoot straight he could be a heck of a player for us!

Nathan returned to form by not making the journey from Newbury and not letting me know until the match had kicked off. It was only luck the we still had 6 players as Leo was set to hang up his boots for the night. Despite Nathan's assertion that he had acceptable work related reasons, one wonders if this is clouding a return of Netball related excuses favoured by other team members.

The introduction of Gareth helped balance the link between attack and defence which has left us either overstretched at the back or painfully unable to score goals in recent weeks. A situation which is reflected in our lowly league position. Last night saw Leo, Steve and Mike breaking up attacks and harassing attackers who previously ran through our defence with ease while Gareth and little Mike were able to consistently harass the opposition defence and Goal. If only we missed the post less and hit the net more we would have won the match by 2 or 3 clear goals. That situation should improve as Gareth and Nathan return to form and fitness. Alongside this, i would like to repeat my assertion that the 6th and winning goal should not have stood due to being over height. Such a travesty should surely be avoided by the use of assisstive technology, although looking at the state of the patchy ball, Goals may not be able to afford such things (or even a competent ref!). I say that as i was struck in the face last night and that wasn't called over height either when by definition alone it was over chest height as it smashed me in my right eye socket.

Anyway, moaning aside, it cannot undo what was an awesome all round performance which pushed the promotion threatening whippersnappers all the way to the final whistle and shows that the The Mollie's are steadily returning to the dominant form we enjoyed 2 seasons ago. Gareth's return also poses a further question; now his son is back in the team, will our 'anonymous commentator' be so willing to slate all and sundry in his reviews of our games?

Gaffers Gob 26/11/08

Last nights match can be summed up by my newly made up saying "What a difference half time makes".

With renewed confidence bolstered by a very strong performance in the first 10 minutes of the match, the Mollie's entered half time, although one down, confident of pressing and gaining a lead in the second half. Indeed this happened with the Mollie's equalising at 5 -5 just after half time. Unfortunately, they went on to score a further ten goals to our one.

My experience in goal tells me that the Mollie's have developed a slightly more defensive and counter attacking system in the time that Gareth and Nathan have been absent. With Nathan playing up front and not tracking back as much as Mike or Alan, i felt busier in goal. It may be that we should play in a 2-1-1 instead of a 2-2 with Nathan kind of utilised as a goal hanger and making use of forward passes and runs from the back from Mike, Leo and Alan (until his lungs allow him to track back more) . It seems to me that the Mollie's did not adequately adapt to a more attacking minded player returning (a similar problem to when Carlos played). That's not to detract from the constant threat on goal that Nathan poses and his finishing will become more clinical as his fitness and timing return and the Mollie's adapt to having him back up front (and it was nice to have someone make use of a kick off and to aim at when throwing the ball out). Alan (another goal threat of an entirely different calibre) was likely disappointed as his well finished own goal was disallowed for being over head height when he deflected it into the corner. However, it was a deadly finish none the less and one that the gaffer should be aware of at all times should he wish to back pass.

These teething problems should not detract from what was a very good performance at the back with Leo and Steve putting in very good defensive displays and Mike and Alan carrying the ball forward well. Unfortunately the Mollie's were a bit profligate up front (although their keeper(s) had a very good performance) despite Leo's long range effort being the goal of the game. Should our striking tighten up a bit i can feel confident that we'll do very when in Div 1. I say that in light of The Elite and Best Since Best (our next two opponents) drawing 17 all last night hinting that i may be something of a dart board in the next two matches.

Gaffers Gob

The Hurricanes seem to have decided that discretion is the better part of valour (or they just fancied watching the England match instead) this week and cancelled on us. Despite this being our first win of the season, Steve took the news badly and at lunch on Wednesday, was nigh on crying into his Americano coffee. Despite his defensive hard man status and Vinnie Jones like reputation, he really does take rejection badly. Anyway, kick off is 7pm next week and see's the return of one half of our strike force in Nathan. Gareth despite being advised to have another month lay off played through an 11 a side match during the week without issue so will hopefully return quickly.

Gaffer's Gob (Athletico Becks 12/11/08)

A week is a long time in charge of the Mollie's neatly sums up my feelings following Wednesday nights performance against Athletico Becks. After the detritus that was our match against the Elite the return of Big Mike and Robbie injected some much needed defensive backbone into our aging line-up at the expense of any attack minded players. Therefore it was no surprise that we held up well only conceding 6 goals, equally it was no surprise we only scored 4. However, in terms of sheer performance and guts shown it was a marked improvement from the previous week. Steve continued to show that he is the dirtiest player in our league with cynical trips and defensive positioning offsetting a lack of speed. Robbie also showed natural athleticism in barely breaking a sweat following a lay of about 3 months.

What made this a much more pleasing performance was the passing and general skill shown by the Mollie's (except up front). The impending return of Nathan is a boost for next week, especially given the natural finishing of Mike (some 40 foot above the bar and counting) and Alan (great finish, wrong net). However, this small errors in front of goal aside, the team has shown a great return to form with the hope of three points next week against fellow relegation battlers The Hurricanes. They lost 20-7 against The Elite on Wednesday indicating that the ringer may be a somewhat more permanent problem than hoped. Equally, our net loss by 8 goals against their 13 goals indicates that we may have some hope for our first points of the season.

Gaffer's Gob (The Elite 5/11/08)

To supplement the infrequent and somewhat fictional match reports provided by Lungboy, the Gaffer has decided to add his own spin on the (at the moment) weekly debacle that is The Molly's.

"Oh dear", pretty much sums up last night abject display against our easy 3 pointers, The Elite. The Molly's suffered from a combination of an inability to hit the back of the net for the second week in a row and the introduction of a Southampton and Portsmouth FC schoolboy 'ringer'. I have it on good authority that he was drafted in to counter the threat posed by Gareth. Whether he continues to pose a threat in the future i suppose hinges on whether he will want to continue to play at Goals on a cold Wednesday Winters night.

However, ringers aside, Molly's did not help themselves with a lack of movement that could have turned the game when an opposition whipper snapper took umbrage at the referee for having the temerity to tell him off for attempting to decapitate our resident defensive journalist Lungboy. Safe to say the ref was happy at being called a see you next tuesday and reduced the opposition to 4 players.

At half time we were 8 goals behind as we were at the end of the match. Tactically in retrospect we could have asked Carlos to goal hang and brought little mike back to help break the midfield as for all of Carlos's flair and ball skills, his Latin tackling was not his best suit. We frequently had 2 or 3 players trying to tackle one leaving a man over which is criminal when you have a numerical advantage. Either way, next week should see the return of Mike and the possible return of Robbie if he returns my email and text messages.

I am somewhat concerned about Don's prognosis that Gareth will be out for another month. There is no doubt we have missed the duo of Gareth and Nathan up front as our lowly league position will testify. Oh and if anyone thinks that i missed criticism of myself, i have to admit that i was shocking in goal last night.

Gaffer's Gob (Best Since Best 29/10/08)

Bit of a shocker this one. Molly's appeared to be outplayed in all areas of the pitch. Despite an injection of continental flair from Carlos, and some fairly accurate and intricate passing, Molly's rarely hit the back of the net. Alongside this, there appeared to be a lack of communication between the front players and defence leaving Steve and Leo exposed at the back and trying to counter overlaps. All in all, a bit of a rude awakening for the Molly's entering a new season, highlighting the need for a speedy recovery of Gareth and Nathan.

Look-a-Likes - No 1 in the series - Matt